INFJ+INFJ? - Page 2

Angantyr · 22-11-2009, 12:31

I surprisingly have 2 female friends who are both INFJ's and in all honesty I do not see it working with either of them.

The first one I talk to online is over emotional, she has a terrible history and whilst I love her I can't see any form of relationship happening with us. We are too similar, we would rub each other the wrong way after too much time together. We're both rather clingy but distance at the wrong time. I was just talking to her before and she seems to be having an emotional breakdown, I want to be there for her but I can't as its just too much for me.

The second girl is somebody I get on great with, we are bother very passionate about what we get into. We both are very quiet people but have our intense "moments" and have periods where we come off as quite cold and distance but open up to people we love. Also both of us are love with (different) ENFP's. I just don't see it working, after too much contact I know we would clash and it'd get worse.

Both of them are great friends but there's no passion.

Roger · 22-11-2009, 12:36

Quote:

Originally Posted by laffeytaffey

What do you guys think? Can two INFJs be in a successful relationship? So far it seems that the answer is yes. We understand each other so well... But, I hear that if you're too similar to the other, one of you will get bored quickly. He disagrees with me and says that he couldn't possibly ever get bored of me, but I want your opinions and/or stories. Thanks guys!

See, i think it depends on both. How they are thinking, how much they are honest with each other, what they want from each other? IF everything is clear and good between two infjs, they will never get bored, i am sure.

In fact, they both will enjoy their company. Because understanding and right application is there.

laffeytaffey · 22-11-2009, 21:25

Quote:

Originally Posted by Angantyr

I surprisingly have 2 female friends who are both INFJ's and in all honesty I do not see it working with either of them.

The first one I talk to online is over emotional, she has a terrible history and whilst I love her I can't see any form of relationship happening with us. We are too similar, we would rub each other the wrong way after too much time together. We're both rather clingy but distance at the wrong time. I was just talking to her before and she seems to be having an emotional breakdown, I want to be there for her but I can't as its just too much for me.

The second girl is somebody I get on great with, we are bother very passionate about what we get into. We both are very quiet people but have our intense "moments" and have periods where we come off as quite cold and distance but open up to people we love. Also both of us are love with (different) ENFP's. I just don't see it working, after too much contact I know we would clash and it'd get worse.

Both of them are great friends but there's no passion.

Hmm... What if you can talk to another INFJ for hours and hours and only get off the computer from needing to sleep? And you meet them and there really seems to be a great potential for a relationship?
I'm an INFJ, but certainly not over emotional. And I don't clash with people unless they're rude or pushy people. lol

laffeytaffey · 22-11-2009, 21:31

Quote:

Originally Posted by Federer

See, i think it depends on both. How they are thinking, how much they are honest with each other, what they want from each other? IF everything is clear and good between two infjs, they will never get bored, i am sure.

In fact, they both will enjoy their company. Because understanding and right application is there.

*nods* That's pretty much what I was thinking. That despite us having a good number of things in common,get get along soo well because we want the same thing. I've found that being with someone more opposite of nature greatly upsets me, because they just don't understand me and my needs. *shudders at memory*

NeverAmI · 22-11-2009, 21:34

Quote:

Originally Posted by smiffy

long story short! fuck MBTI!!! try not get ahead of yourself and find out by spending time with the person if it will work or not!

x2

NeverAmI · 22-11-2009, 21:37

Maturity and common interests/personalities are so much more important than MBTI.

laffeytaffey · 22-11-2009, 21:43

Quote:

Originally Posted by NeverAmI

Maturity and common interests/personalities are so much more important than MBTI.

I completely agree, but I still wanted other opinions.
Maturity: Both mature
Interests: A good bit in common
Personalities: Also similar. Both funny and really nice, sometimes quiet (but in a good companionable way) etc

So, I'd say that the odds our good.

NeverAmI · 22-11-2009, 21:46

Quote:

Originally Posted by laffeytaffey

I completely agree, but I still wanted other opinions.
Maturity: Both mature
Interests: A good bit in common
Personalities: Also similar. Both funny and really nice, sometimes quiet (but in a good companionable way) etc

So, I'd say that the odds our good.

Doesn't sound like there is much reason not to try then! Good luck!!!

solongotgon · 22-11-2009, 22:04

Quote:

Originally Posted by laffeytaffey

Hmm... What if you can talk to another INFJ for hours and hours and only get off the computer from needing to sleep? And you meet them and there really seems to be a great potential for a relationship?
I'm an INFJ, but certainly not over emotional. And I don't clash with people unless they're rude or pushy people. lol

The long hours of conversation "validates" the needs that most INFJs have on a personal level. I don't think it will substitute for a relationship material.

But who knows...maybe he IS your soulmate.

laffeytaffey · 23-11-2009, 02:27

Quote:

Originally Posted by NeverAmI

Doesn't sound like there is much reason not to try then! Good luck!!!

*beams* Thanks!

laffeytaffey · 23-11-2009, 02:31

Quote:

Originally Posted by solongotgon

The long hours of conversation "validates" the needs that most INFJs have on a personal level. I don't think it will substitute for a relationship material.

But who knows...maybe he IS your soulmate.

Perhaps. I try not to hope for these things TOO much, so I'm not disappointed. Way too many of those in my life... I'm sure you can all relate to that!

~~Seeker of Truth~~ · 23-11-2009, 07:52

I've been in love with this INFJ friend for the longest time but I know deep in me that it will never work for the reasons others have said about the issue that we would need a relationship based on growth. We both are almost the same way and I know sadly and simply that it's a fairy tale and a beautiful dream at the end. That's my personal story and by no means is this intended to influence on yours.

Good luck in your relationship and hope it brings the fulfillment that it promises it would bring.

Naxx · 23-11-2009, 07:58

Quote:

Originally Posted by solongotgon

Compatibility will be great and you will get into a "comfortable" zone. But after two years you will get bored if the other INFJ is not up for trying new things....Good Luck

Plus its all about the type of relationship/lifestyle you want with that person. You don't want to be in a relationship that does not help you grow...and from my experience most INFJs grow from being exposed to other types.

It's a catch 22. InFJ's love comfort and understanding, but you will desire something different...or at least I did. The understanding and comfort does not make for an exciting relationship...unless you are very stable and mature person.

Any type has the ability not to try new things. In fact I would say most people do not try new things.

~~corndogman~~ · 23-11-2009, 08:12

Sounds like a lot of high expectations waiting to be crushed with reality.

laffeytaffey · 25-11-2009, 04:30

Quote:

Originally Posted by uberrogo

Sounds like a lot of high expectations waiting to be crushed with reality.

Ouch *cringes* I'll let you know. lol

22-11-2009, 21:37	#26
NeverAmI Shoshin Join Date: 22 Sep 2009 Age: 28 Posts: 7,499 Posts Per Day: 21.29 MBTI: INTP Location: Iowa	Maturity and common interests/personalities are so much more important than MBTI. __________________ "He who fights with monsters should be careful lest he thereby become a monster. And if thou gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will also gaze into thee." -Nietzsche "Time is nothing but a misrepresentation of now." -Victor Wooten http://neverami.tumblr.com

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22-11-2009, 12:31	#21
Angantyr Newbie Join Date: 12 Nov 2009 Age: 24 Posts: 40 Posts Per Day: 0.13 MBTI: INFJ Location: New Zealand	I surprisingly have 2 female friends who are both INFJ's and in all honesty I do not see it working with either of them. The first one I talk to online is over emotional, she has a terrible history and whilst I love her I can't see any form of relationship happening with us. We are too similar, we would rub each other the wrong way after too much time together. We're both rather clingy but distance at the wrong time. I was just talking to her before and she seems to be having an emotional breakdown, I want to be there for her but I can't as its just too much for me. The second girl is somebody I get on great with, we are bother very passionate about what we get into. We both are very quiet people but have our intense "moments" and have periods where we come off as quite cold and distance but open up to people we love. Also both of us are love with (different) ENFP's. I just don't see it working, after too much contact I know we would clash and it'd get worse. Both of them are great friends but there's no passion.

23-11-2009, 07:52	#32
~~Seeker of Truth~~ On Holiday Join Date: 08 Feb 2009 Age: 23 Posts: 1,703 Posts Per Day: 2.94 MBTI: INFJ Location: Earth	I've been in love with this INFJ friend for the longest time but I know deep in me that it will never work for the reasons others have said about the issue that we would need a relationship based on growth. We both are almost the same way and I know sadly and simply that it's a fairy tale and a beautiful dream at the end. That's my personal story and by no means is this intended to influence on yours. Good luck in your relationship and hope it brings the fulfillment that it promises it would bring.

23-11-2009, 08:12	#34
~~corndogman~~ On Holiday Join Date: 17 Feb 2009 Age: 30 Posts: 2,569 Posts Per Day: 4.51 MBTI: BULL Location: The Region	Sounds like a lot of high expectations waiting to be crushed with reality.

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